Are you stuck on the wrong side of right?

Are you more interested in being right, or in achieving the best possible outcome?

The Trap of Being Right

You’ve probably been there—digging your heels in, convinced you’re right, fighting to prove your point at all costs. But what if that need to be right is keeping you from something even more important? What if, in trying so hard to win, you’re actually losing?

We often fall into the trap of prioritising being "right" over achieving the best outcome. This "wrong side of right" mentality blinds us to alternative solutions and hinders progress.

This is the misguided pursuit of being correct, a common error many fall into is prioritising the validation of their own correctness over striving for the most beneficial result. This, leading them to the wrong side of what truly matters.

We become so focused on defending our position that we lose sight of the bigger picture and the potential for a better result. This can manifest in our personal lives, our work, and our relationships.

The Biggest Obstacles Are Internal

Most people don’t realise that the biggest obstacles in their lives aren’t external—they're internal.

When our minds are in turmoil, we lash out instead of listening.
We react instead of reasoning.
We hold onto our perspectives so tightly that we forget to ask the most important question: Am I aiming for the best outcome, or just trying to be right?

Perspective and the Danger of Narrow Focus

This fixation on being right stems from our internal state. When we are stressed or feel threatened, we react defensively instead of responding thoughtfully.
Like Firestone said back in 1926, we can get too caught up in the day-to-day grind, "sleeping and eating with our business," and lose perspective.

We get so close to the problem that we can't see the forest for the trees. This narrow focus prevents us from considering new ideas, adapting to changing circumstances, or even noticing when it's time to "call an audible" and pivot to a better approach.
We become performative, like Will Smith reflected when looking back on his career, more concerned with appearances than with genuine progress.

The world rewards those who can think differently, who can challenge assumptions and pivot when necessary. But being contrarian alone isn’t enough—it has to be advantageous divergence, the ability to go against the grain and_be correct.

The problem? Most people are too consumed with their immediate reality to step back and gain the perspective needed to see a better path. They mistake grinding away at the wrong thing for resilience, when sometimes the strongest move is knowing when to walk away.

Cultivating a Calm and Rational Mind

This isn’t just about work or arguments—it’s about life. When was the last time you took a step back from your own thinking? Are you trapped in your own bubble, eating and sleeping with the same ideas, too close to see where you're going wrong?

When you are internally calm, you reason and then respond; you don’t just react. When someone slights you, you don’t lash out with angry words or angry fists. You turn the other cheek. When someone cuts you off, we give them the benefit of the doubt. When things go slower than you want, you wait patiently. When someone is passive-aggressive, you refuse to take the bait.

At your best, you put behaviour in perspective—both other people’s and your own.
You do the right thing, not the easy thing, regardless of influence or pressure. A calm mind is not the absence of conflict or stress, but the ability to cope with it. However, in your quest to be right, you often lose this calm, focusing more on winning the argument than solving the issue.

Advantageous Divergence: The Key to Better Decisions

Develop the ability to detach from the need to be right and embrace the pursuit of the best outcome, even if it means admitting you were wrong. This requires a calm mind, the ability to manage stress, and the wisdom to see beyond your immediate circumstances.

Being contrarian isn't hard - anyone can say the opposite of what most people believe. But being contrarian and right is extremely difficult. Those who can both go against the crowd and be correct achieve outsized rewards.

This is called "advantageous divergence" and it's a mental model for thinking through ideas – being willing to think differently from the crowd, and being right about it. It means instead of merely opposing for the sake of opposition, you should aim to understand, expand your perspectives, and sometimes go beyond your immediate environment. It's' recognising when to quit a failing strategy, not as defeat, but as a strategic pivot towards something more promising.

The solution isn’t to fight harder; it’s to see clearer. A truly strong mind isn’t one that bulldozes forward—it’s one that knows when to pause, reassess, and recalibrate. The best decisions come when you’re calm, not when you’re clinging to a need for control.

True Wisdom Lies Beyond Being Right

True wisdom is understanding that being "right" isn’t the goal—achieving the best outcome is. And sometimes, the best outcome means letting go of an argument, stepping away from a failing plan, or even changing your entire approach.

By shifting your focus from proving yourself right to achieving the best outcome, you open ourselves up to new possibilities, greater understanding, and ultimately, more successful results.

It’s about having the courage to challenge your own assumptions, learn from your mistakes, and prioritise progress over ego. It’s about recognising, as Harvey S. Firestone suggested, that gaining perspective, whether from books, people, or simply stepping away from the immediate situation, is crucial for good work and good decisions.
It's about being contrarian and right, which leads to outsized rewards, not just financially, but in terms of personal growth and fulfillment.

The Ultimate Challenge: Letting Go to Truly Win

Are you willing to let go of the need to be right in order to get what you truly want? Are you brave enough to challenge your own perspective before challenging others?

Because the moment you stop gripping so tightly to your own certainty, you unlock something far greater: the ability to actually win—not just this battle, but the right war.

In essence, the journey from being right to achieving the best outcome involves embracing a broader perspective, managing your internal state for calmness and clarity, and daring to diverge advantageously from the common path when it serves the greater good. This shift in focus not only leads to better results but also to a more fulfilled and balanced life.

The Essential Concepts

Prioritise Outcomes Over Being Right: The focus should be on achieving the best possible outcome, even if it means admitting you were wrong or changing your approach. Being "right" can be a trap that prevents progress.

Internal Obstacles: Often, the biggest obstacles to success are internal, such as ego, defensiveness, and a need to be right. Managing your internal state is crucial.

Perspective is Key: Stepping back from a situation to gain perspective is essential for making good decisions. Being too close to a problem can blind you to better solutions.

Calm Mind, Better Decisions: A calm and rational mind allows for thoughtful responses rather than impulsive reactions. Managing stress and emotions is crucial for effective decision-making.

Advantageous Divergence: Being contrarian and correct is a powerful combination. It involves challenging assumptions, thinking differently from the crowd, and being right about it. This leads to outsized rewards.

Letting Go of Certainty: True wisdom lies in understanding that being "right" isn't the ultimate goal—achieving the best outcome is. Letting go of the need to be right opens up new possibilities.

Continuous Learning and Growth: Challenging your own assumptions, learning from mistakes, and prioritising progress over ego are essential for personal and professional growth.

The Importance of Perspective: Actively seeking diverse perspectives, whether from books, other people, or by simply taking a step back, is crucial for making sound judgments.

I am a Knowledge Worker...

What does it mean for me?

This post offers a profound strategic lens for accelerating your career growth in a corporate setting. It highlights how the common urge to be "right" can be an Internal Obstacle, preventing you from achieving the best outcomes for your projects and team. You might find yourself locked in a narrow focus, defending your initial ideas or proposals even when new information suggests a better path. The core message is to consciously Prioritise Outcomes Over Being Right, understanding that true influence and success come from achieving optimal results, not personal validation. By cultivating a Calm Mind, Better Decisions through emotional regulation and developing Advantageous Divergence (the ability to think differently and be correct), you can Let Go of Certainty, gain crucial Perspective, and consistently drive superior results, making you an invaluable asset to your organization.

How do I action this?

• Implement a "Best Outcome" Pre-Mortem: Before presenting a significant proposal or project plan, mentally fast-forward to its completion. Instead of focusing on being right, imagine the project achieved the best possible outcome. Now, backtrack: What diverse perspectives or contradictory data would have been crucial to consider? This helps Prioritise Outcomes Over Being Right and fosters The Importance of Perspective.
• Practice "Emotional Detachment" in Disagreements: In your next heated team discussion or disagreement, consciously notice your internal emotional reaction. Instead of immediately defending your position, take a deep breath and ask, "What's the best outcome for this situation, regardless of whose idea it is?" This cultivates a Calm Mind, Better Decisions by managing Internal Obstacles.
• Seek "Advantageous Divergence" Feedback: For a complex problem you're trying to solve, develop your preferred solution. Then, explicitly seek feedback from 1-2 colleagues known for their unconventional thinking or who operate in a different department. Ask them, "How would someone else approach this, completely outside our usual way of thinking?" This encourages Advantageous Divergence by broadening your Perspective.
• Create a "Learning from Wrongness" Log: Keep a brief, private log. For each instance where you realize you were wrong about a work assumption or decision, note down (1) what you believed, (2) what changed your mind, and (3) what new insight or action resulted. This systematically reinforces Letting Go of Certainty and promotes Continuous Learning and Growth.

I am a Freelancer, Solopreneur, Entrepreneur, Independent Worker...

What does it mean for me?

This post provides a vital framework for navigating the volatile landscape of independent business. The urge to be "right" about your product, market, or strategy can be a significant Internal Obstacle, leading to stubborn adherence to failing plans. You might be operating with a narrow focus, too close to your own venture to see emerging opportunities or necessary pivots. The core message is to consciously Prioritise Outcomes Over Being Right – whether that's revenue, customer satisfaction, or sustainable growth – even if it means admitting mistakes. By cultivating a Calm Mind, Better Decisions to manage entrepreneurial stress and mastering Advantageous Divergence (the ability to challenge market norms and be proven correct), you can Let Go of Certainty, gain critical Perspective, and consistently make astute strategic moves that lead to outsized rewards and sustainable business growth.

How do I action this?

• Conduct a "Customer Hypothesis Invalidation" Interview: For your next 2-3 customer discovery calls, enter with a specific hypothesis about your customer's biggest problem or ideal solution. Spend the majority of the conversation actively trying to disprove your hypothesis with targeted questions. This forces you to Prioritise Outcomes Over Being Right by seeking unbiased truths directly from your market.
• Implement a "10-Minute Market Perspective" Daily Ritual: Each morning, dedicate 10 minutes to intentionally reading or thinking about something outside your immediate business bubble. This could be a trend in a different industry, a philosophy book, or news from a non-business source. This cultivates The Importance of Perspective and helps combat a narrow focus.
• Perform a "Strategic Pivot Audit" (Monthly): Once a month, review your core business strategy. Ask yourself: "If I had to pivot away from my current primary offering, what would be the most compelling alternative? What evidence suggests my current path might be sub-optimal?" This proactive exercise encourages Advantageous Divergence and the courage to Let Go of Certainty before a crisis hits.
• Develop a "Calm Decision-Making Protocol": For any significant business decision (e.g., pricing change, new feature launch, marketing campaign investment), define a rule: you will not make the final decision when feeling stressed or rushed. Instead, take a minimum 4-hour break, engage in a calming activity, and then revisit the decision with a clearer mind. This trains your Calm Mind, Better Decisions by managing Internal Obstacles.